I actually do like beetroot…

I just discovered a few days ago that I actually do like beetroot…

This really sucks butt, cos' when I think of all of the beetroot I have skipped, picked off and thrown away over the years…It got me thinking…"What else is out there that I have been missing by being such a picky eater...?"

So I have decided to pay the beetroot back by launching a "Love for Beetroot" campaign…

The Slogan…"Love Beetroot…Fuck Egg-plant! "… so spread the word children!


~billy

News just in...

Men all over the world must stop giving their wives, girlfriends, or whatever they want to call their female companions, any chocolates... No chocolates... not on Valentines Day, not on her birthday... NEVER!

As it has recently been scientifically proven that when a woman eats chocolate, it causes the body to release the same sort of hormones that are released after an orgasm and she then feels satisfied.

A quick translation of the scientific talk above... "This means that the guy WILL HAVE EVEN A LESS OF A CHANCE OF GETTING ANY." Or don't they know this?

Jeeeeezzzz... luckily this has been discovered just in time before Christmas and Valentines day next year!!!

Spread the word guys... we need to look after our species interests!!!


~billy

poor... poor lobsters

Having seen Lobsters during the flick i went to go see last nite... it got me thinking about what i saw in a restuarant a few months back that I was meaning to have a bitch about!!!

So here it is... It is plain and simple... I think the process of how Lobsters are cooked just sucks... They boil the poor sons of bitches ALIVE in a pot of hell-hot boiling water!

Jeeeeeeeez, could we find some crueler way of cooking these invertebrates, animals or shell-fish, perhaps? Maybe flame broil them alive? Or, hell, let's just eat them raw and alive; rip those snapping claws right off, and bite in!

I knew humans were mean, lousy bastards, but this is cruel even for them... How would YOU like to be boiled alive?? I think that's what we should do to people who do cook lobsters like that...

Don't get me wrong; I have nothing against people killing thingz to chow down on, but I just think we should be a hell of a lot more humane about it... At least kill the poor lobster before cooking it... Just think of the uproar there would be if we made our steaks by throwing a live calf on a fire... and watch it flop around, scream-mooo and kick around in agony for a few minutes!!!

Sure, the animal-lovers would crawl out of the wood work and there would be huge upset about THAT, but apparently lobsters aren't as important to them as cows... After all, lobsters aren't as cute to look at, and don't make any sort of sound, they aint furry or even have any facial expressions, so why feel bad about killing them any way we want?

Oh how I hate such self-serving human attitudes... Of course, I know they'll never change, and lobsters will likely continue to be boiled to death so people with huge amounts of money to blow can have a gourmet dinner...

But... an intresting fact is that lobsters are primarily bottom scavengers / feeders... which means they will eat almost anything, dead, decaying or alive! So I hope evil-cruel-gourmet dinner buyers all choke and get blocked bums!!!

~billy

~billyb##zer is back home... with all the fingers, all the toes... and NO vd's!!!!

Well... I.R back from the my travels... back in da' R of S.A... friggin kickin' & fighting the first week back @ the office in da' concrete jungle and slit-throat-rat-race of Jo-ma's-burg!

Grrrrrrr... although so far so good! So I can't really complain! I suppose I do still have a bit of the lazy-chilled holiday vibe left, the beach tan, a maxed-out-cryin' credit card and 3 weeks of dirty laundry to remind me of the holiday!!!

So all in all... the holiday was totally awesome, just what the witch doctor ordered!!! I saw and did a whole lot of diffrent, beautiful and strange things! Travelled to through to Paris, Toulouse, Spain and the UK... where my visit and the Reading Festival with my best-est mate "BiG-C" was out of this world!!!

Sadz & I drank, we partied, we moshed, we laughed and had some good ol' much needed fun!!! I still cant believe it flew pass so quickly! just like the other day we were starting our mornings off with a Carlberg's beer at 9am and group moshing the pommies into the ground and drinking cold beer all day long in the sun!!!
Now I am already back... no beer, no sun and no head shakening music! I think I am starting to develope the D.T's already!!!!

The festival was jammed pack'd...wit
all types of creatures from all corners of the earth and even some from beyond!!! The punk'd, the goths, the lost, the small and then the BIG & scary!!!!






NOFX, Foo-fighters, Rise against and even MM were by far the best at the festival really putting on a show and making the crowd go absolutely ape-shit!!!

There were however a hand full of dissappointments... bands i thought would kick serious ass!!! Like "The (fat-cant-sing) Pixies", "Iggy (I-took-a-double-hit-of-street-crack-B4-i-played) Pop, Dinosuar (we-cant-play-instruments) Jnr, All American (I-get-paid-to-whine) Rejects and a few other bands sounded like lil' hi-school wanna-be's rather than the kick-butt energctic rock Gods they used to be back in the day!!!

Which makes me believe... if I was a famous rock icon / singer or Adut movie star... " I would rather die or fade away long before my time... as so many did like Kurt, Lennon, Bob, Jimmi, Tupac and Debbie'does'Dallas did... rather than 30 or 40 years down the line be playing a badly-lifeless re-union gig while in nappies to some stoned kids who are young enough to be their grand-children! Or is that just me...?

Whats the saying... have your candle blown out early... instead of burning down to nothing and flickering out... or something like that...? Blaah Blaaah blah!!

Anyways... the few poor bands, the large-pushy-stinky-crowds, the puke-inducing-swomp-donkey-filthly-public Toilets and a few punches here or there did not spoil the entire festival!!! It was totally awesome and I would have to recommend everyone should attend a music event the size of Reading at least once in their lives!!! Its out of this world!!!

So... on that note... I have to be off!!! Gotta work... and then go on lunch!!!

But before I do sign off... I just wish human cloning was legal in todays world... As I would clone every single lady & mofo out there a 1980 model copy of MY bud Sadz... aka BiG-C... As he is the best... he is the funniest... he is the most generous... and he was my wingman in the biggest mosh I have ever been in and he is my life-long--no-shit-no-frills-here-a-beer BUD!!!!!!!!!!

I think the world / life / people in general would be less fucked up if there were more people out there like him!!! So please people... do yourselves a favour... should cloning ever be legalised in the future... keep your eyes peeled for the carbon copy of Sadz aka BiG-C! As he has a heart the size of his left shoe, his mouth and fists as big as his right shoes... and well ladies... everything else as BIG as both his shoes (size 11)!!! (N.B - This is only hear-say and not actual perossnal hands on eye-witness shit OK!!!) (ha hahaaa)

So people... Thats that! Have yourselves a good Beer and Burp filled two day break... As it is F...F...Fr..Frrrr... Friiii.... FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~billyb##zer.